Saturday, May 03, 2003
random white flowers, one square of asphalt.
the door that gets conventietly placed
behind a tree on a backwards house.
you can get in but there's no way out.
unless you walk through a tree.
the one thing you cant do is everything,
the one thing that you cant make go away.
and so what if you were standing there crying?
this just hurts more than being hurt.
and i could swear by your expression
that the pain down in your soul
was the same as the one down in mine way back.
thats the pain that cuts a straight line
down through the heart,
we call it love dead with apprehension.
each second is a century.
keep waking up screaming.
scream and scream but there is no noise.
echoes in your own head.
a lack of. inexistant, ineffectual. scream.
and when i saw Him
i threw myself right into His arms and sobbed
i dont like feeling like this after a day's of emotional ups and downs. perhaps its the misery of songs flowing in my blood. or just an overdose of evanescence. hmns. God created me in a strange way. He must have forgot the inside when he painted me. sighs. -pats on my back- everything will be okay. God's in control, remember girl?
anyways. to shoes and toe out there. i strongly feel that the last words of each line in the song should rhyme, in the ole chino style.
][jukebox][ evanescence - my immortal
][feeling][
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase
shoes and toe just went home. -looks at the clock- ooh! erm two hours ago. yepps. -grinns- had an enjoyable time together fiddling around with my piano, electone and clavinova. like shoes was fascinated. wow! wow! wow! hahas. and we finally started on our song. after toe got her lyrics inspirations from evanescence. grr. and evanescence and linkin park and the stroke have been playing on and on since the time they territorized my computer. =.= no. they had a war for my mouse. ahas. anyways toe is really rad. she came up with great lyrics while i was trimming shoes' hair. [which didnt take long] anyways, we just had lotsa fun together. clashes in music tastes but we settled on the evanescencey style. ahas. cos we're only doing it on the piano, right shoes? val? oh wells. im glad we're getting somewhere. and we're doing great. that's the best thing. have this urge to write sth sad. after reading the lyrics toe wrote.
there he stands,
cloaked in forest's hues-
hooded gaze with guarded eyes ablaze
and wind-whipped locks of night
casting their sillouettes across his face.
fleeting expressions of a loss so great
are reflected in the sea's crashing tears
thundering about his ankles.
a heart-felt lament,
escapes his lips and tightening throat
singing of a love lost.
tendrils of sea-grass slice miniscule cuts about his feet
but still he stands staring at a horizon that he wants not to meet,
for his tomorrow is dead without her.
and there she stands
atop a cliff of copper and grey,
staring out at him through a new moon's night.
the ebony strands of her hair blowing across her face
do little to hide her flowing tears.
as he sings his grief unto the stars,
her heart skips two beats
and she stands torn.
she lived a lie to make him love her,
but she cannot decieve him past this night.
if only he knew of her hurt and her pain
and the void that she feels without him.
but he deserves much more than she could ever give,
for what can a vagabond rogue such as her,
offer a prince?
so there they are, rendered vulnerable.
two halves of a great tragedy to defy the times.
and the tears just keep on coming
][jukebox][ evanescence - my immortal
][feeling][ inspired
pray for me.
it's a soft-spoken murmur,
an unintelligable mumble.
it's a love song at midnight,
a desperate call to heaven.
it's a cry and a whisper,
trembling lips and rug burn knees.
it's pleading and asking
and an answer with mercy.
God's here, and I'll pray for you.
cos im lazy.
my day will be ripped from toe's blog
what i did today...
quote toe [[Just got back from a wonderful lunch date with rons and yogs ;). And a crappy one too lol. We went Breeks and argh it was act. kinda weird for me at first cause yogs a vegeterian and rons just became one today (XD), but the food made me forget about everything haha, and yogs + rons lame jokes XD. Too bad diana had to go for piano lessons :P. They have this cute little thing at Breeks, everytime a customer walks in or goes out, ALL the staff will say "Welcome.." or "Thank you..." in unison XD. It was so cool! And ours were particularly loud :) (I'm 100% sure yogs loved it :D). We dropped by Seoul garden, said hi to the peeps there, went to pass money to eddie (like very long never see him liao XD, and he mysteriously looked younger), and me and yogs ended up having an intense conversation inside the mrt station at the escalators XD. Today was good ;D.]] unquote.
of cos. i left for cg after toe met eddie [[?!?!?]]. and had a wonderful time at cg. -thumbs up- and yea. im turning vegeterian. hahas. surprised? well i know toe was. she's waiting for the day i succumb to the juicy tender chicken meat. but NO! im going green. anyone care to join me? hahas. which means - no more seoul garden. hahas. and no shoe! im not cooking for you guys on friday. -bleahs- my kitchen's fully equipped though. you can try impressing me with your culinary skills. but. remember. no meat. -grinns-.
so i came home announcing im going green. but why doesnt anyone seem to believe i'll stop eating chicken? i mean, i dont eat beef pork lamp seafood whatever right from the start. the only poultry i take is chicken. so, what's the fuss? it's just an item missing. -whines inside- hahas. yogs. it's not my fault if i dont stick to my green diet alright? it's just that. i really really have crazy craving for chicken kies. but yea. after all the horror stories of chicken you told me, i think im pretty determined. for today. for now. at least. =) i'll do my best. yeay!
][jukebox][ chris tomlin - forever
][feeling][ amused
even in the midst of the storm
he'll still be here with me
sighs. im feeling so full. still. and my tummy's feeling so weak. urgh. toe. cheap stuff's really not good. -sighs- we should never go for 50% discounts anymore. yea. so the trip today to the new amk seoul garden was real rad besides the part toe cheated me =.=. we were having fun, you know, eating and joking away. and oh yes. you should ask toe herself to tell you how silly she was. -feels amused all over- but. after stepping outta that seoul garden. both of us were like so full we had to lug ourselves to the station to meet fio's friend. he's erm. hmn. erm. really inclined towards his feminine side. -chuckles- but oh wells. we went to many guardian pharmacies to search for toe's stuff. hmn. to no avail though. so we switched to nerd modes. and went in search for books. library!!! -grinns- anyhows. long, painful yet happy day out with my toe. -huggies- you're like my medicine. you cured my blues. lol. but. sorry. He's still my ultimate antidote. hahas. then again, for now. my tummy just hurts big time. -sighs- but yes! breeks is still on tomms. you can't escape. -grinns-
][jukebox][ clay - something new
][feeling][ a bad tummy ache. -ouch-
the pain hurts so much
my prayer is for immunity to emotions
why will it not go away? uh huh, god, you'll be here. now, please, now? last night was turmoil. on stage today was tormenting. i played the opposite character. every moment, the voice at the back of my head whispered, "the show must go on." yet when the night cascades. the mask rips itself apart. and the tears fall. for a reason i know not. for a rhyme unheard of. im not wiping on my bed, god. im crying my heart out loud to you.
toe. being emotional is not a good thing. -cries-
][jukebox][ more of you, lord
][feeling][ detached
have you ever looked into my eye and said,
"i know this girl"?
i woke up today with a heavy heart. and somehow. i started crying on my bed at one point of time or another. it was a five hours soulful cry. ive no idea why i cried that long. or how i started. i remember looking into that jinxed mirror and saw the tears printed on my face. i thought of calling someone but when i picked up the phone, i realised, i know none of my friend's number by memory, except one. but i figured that one would not be appropriate. that friend... is a detached one of mine. somehow, when we look at each other in the eye, we'd turn away. it just didnt seem right. then i figured i could dial a number up to heaven. i wanted to hear god's voice. but. i never knew the correct number. and im pretty much certain heaven wouldnt be listed in the yellow pages. cos it should be found somewhere in my heart. yet i dont know why but i knew my prayers went wrong. wrong frequency perhaps.
"only the children know what they are looking for," said the little prince. "they waste their time over a rag doll and it becomes very important to them; and if anybody takes it away from them, they cry..." -the lil prince
][juekbox][ jaci velasquez - just a prayer away
][feeling][
the door that gets conventietly placed
behind a tree on a backwards house.
you can get in but there's no way out.
unless you walk through a tree.
the one thing you cant do is everything,
the one thing that you cant make go away.
and so what if you were standing there crying?
this just hurts more than being hurt.
and i could swear by your expression
that the pain down in your soul
was the same as the one down in mine way back.
thats the pain that cuts a straight line
down through the heart,
we call it love dead with apprehension.
each second is a century.
keep waking up screaming.
scream and scream but there is no noise.
echoes in your own head.
a lack of. inexistant, ineffectual. scream.
bitinn` awayy at 10:07 AM
i threw myself right into His arms and sobbed
i dont like feeling like this after a day's of emotional ups and downs. perhaps its the misery of songs flowing in my blood. or just an overdose of evanescence. hmns. God created me in a strange way. He must have forgot the inside when he painted me. sighs. -pats on my back- everything will be okay. God's in control, remember girl?
anyways. to shoes and toe out there. i strongly feel that the last words of each line in the song should rhyme, in the ole chino style.
][jukebox][ evanescence - my immortal
][feeling][
bitinn` awayy at 10:00 AM
Friday, May 02, 2003there's just too much that time cannot erase
shoes and toe just went home. -looks at the clock- ooh! erm two hours ago. yepps. -grinns- had an enjoyable time together fiddling around with my piano, electone and clavinova. like shoes was fascinated. wow! wow! wow! hahas. and we finally started on our song. after toe got her lyrics inspirations from evanescence. grr. and evanescence and linkin park and the stroke have been playing on and on since the time they territorized my computer. =.= no. they had a war for my mouse. ahas. anyways toe is really rad. she came up with great lyrics while i was trimming shoes' hair. [which didnt take long] anyways, we just had lotsa fun together. clashes in music tastes but we settled on the evanescencey style. ahas. cos we're only doing it on the piano, right shoes? val? oh wells. im glad we're getting somewhere. and we're doing great. that's the best thing. have this urge to write sth sad. after reading the lyrics toe wrote.
cloaked in forest's hues-
hooded gaze with guarded eyes ablaze
and wind-whipped locks of night
casting their sillouettes across his face.
fleeting expressions of a loss so great
are reflected in the sea's crashing tears
thundering about his ankles.
a heart-felt lament,
escapes his lips and tightening throat
singing of a love lost.
tendrils of sea-grass slice miniscule cuts about his feet
but still he stands staring at a horizon that he wants not to meet,
for his tomorrow is dead without her.
and there she stands
atop a cliff of copper and grey,
staring out at him through a new moon's night.
the ebony strands of her hair blowing across her face
do little to hide her flowing tears.
as he sings his grief unto the stars,
her heart skips two beats
and she stands torn.
she lived a lie to make him love her,
but she cannot decieve him past this night.
if only he knew of her hurt and her pain
and the void that she feels without him.
but he deserves much more than she could ever give,
for what can a vagabond rogue such as her,
offer a prince?
so there they are, rendered vulnerable.
two halves of a great tragedy to defy the times.
and the tears just keep on coming
][jukebox][ evanescence - my immortal
][feeling][ inspired
bitinn` awayy at 7:30 AM
Thursday, May 01, 2003pray for me.
it's a soft-spoken murmur,
an unintelligable mumble.
it's a love song at midnight,
a desperate call to heaven.
it's a cry and a whisper,
trembling lips and rug burn knees.
it's pleading and asking
and an answer with mercy.
God's here, and I'll pray for you.
bitinn` awayy at 2:37 AM
Wednesday, April 30, 2003my day will be ripped from toe's blog
what i did today...
quote toe [[Just got back from a wonderful lunch date with rons and yogs ;). And a crappy one too lol. We went Breeks and argh it was act. kinda weird for me at first cause yogs a vegeterian and rons just became one today (XD), but the food made me forget about everything haha, and yogs + rons lame jokes XD. Too bad diana had to go for piano lessons :P. They have this cute little thing at Breeks, everytime a customer walks in or goes out, ALL the staff will say "Welcome.." or "Thank you..." in unison XD. It was so cool! And ours were particularly loud :) (I'm 100% sure yogs loved it :D). We dropped by Seoul garden, said hi to the peeps there, went to pass money to eddie (like very long never see him liao XD, and he mysteriously looked younger), and me and yogs ended up having an intense conversation inside the mrt station at the escalators XD. Today was good ;D.]] unquote.
of cos. i left for cg after toe met eddie [[?!?!?]]. and had a wonderful time at cg. -thumbs up- and yea. im turning vegeterian. hahas. surprised? well i know toe was. she's waiting for the day i succumb to the juicy tender chicken meat. but NO! im going green. anyone care to join me? hahas. which means - no more seoul garden. hahas. and no shoe! im not cooking for you guys on friday. -bleahs- my kitchen's fully equipped though. you can try impressing me with your culinary skills. but. remember. no meat. -grinns-.
so i came home announcing im going green. but why doesnt anyone seem to believe i'll stop eating chicken? i mean, i dont eat beef pork lamp seafood whatever right from the start. the only poultry i take is chicken. so, what's the fuss? it's just an item missing. -whines inside- hahas. yogs. it's not my fault if i dont stick to my green diet alright? it's just that. i really really have crazy craving for chicken kies. but yea. after all the horror stories of chicken you told me, i think im pretty determined. for today. for now. at least. =) i'll do my best. yeay!
][jukebox][ chris tomlin - forever
][feeling][ amused
bitinn` awayy at 10:15 AM
Tuesday, April 29, 2003he'll still be here with me
sighs. im feeling so full. still. and my tummy's feeling so weak. urgh. toe. cheap stuff's really not good. -sighs- we should never go for 50% discounts anymore. yea. so the trip today to the new amk seoul garden was real rad besides the part toe cheated me =.=. we were having fun, you know, eating and joking away. and oh yes. you should ask toe herself to tell you how silly she was. -feels amused all over- but. after stepping outta that seoul garden. both of us were like so full we had to lug ourselves to the station to meet fio's friend. he's erm. hmn. erm. really inclined towards his feminine side. -chuckles- but oh wells. we went to many guardian pharmacies to search for toe's stuff. hmn. to no avail though. so we switched to nerd modes. and went in search for books. library!!! -grinns- anyhows. long, painful yet happy day out with my toe. -huggies- you're like my medicine. you cured my blues. lol. but. sorry. He's still my ultimate antidote. hahas. then again, for now. my tummy just hurts big time. -sighs- but yes! breeks is still on tomms. you can't escape. -grinns-
][jukebox][ clay - something new
][feeling][ a bad tummy ache. -ouch-
bitinn` awayy at 6:40 AM
Monday, April 28, 2003my prayer is for immunity to emotions
why will it not go away? uh huh, god, you'll be here. now, please, now? last night was turmoil. on stage today was tormenting. i played the opposite character. every moment, the voice at the back of my head whispered, "the show must go on." yet when the night cascades. the mask rips itself apart. and the tears fall. for a reason i know not. for a rhyme unheard of. im not wiping on my bed, god. im crying my heart out loud to you.
toe. being emotional is not a good thing. -cries-
][jukebox][ more of you, lord
][feeling][ detached
bitinn` awayy at 8:01 AM
Sunday, April 27, 2003"i know this girl"?
i woke up today with a heavy heart. and somehow. i started crying on my bed at one point of time or another. it was a five hours soulful cry. ive no idea why i cried that long. or how i started. i remember looking into that jinxed mirror and saw the tears printed on my face. i thought of calling someone but when i picked up the phone, i realised, i know none of my friend's number by memory, except one. but i figured that one would not be appropriate. that friend... is a detached one of mine. somehow, when we look at each other in the eye, we'd turn away. it just didnt seem right. then i figured i could dial a number up to heaven. i wanted to hear god's voice. but. i never knew the correct number. and im pretty much certain heaven wouldnt be listed in the yellow pages. cos it should be found somewhere in my heart. yet i dont know why but i knew my prayers went wrong. wrong frequency perhaps.
"only the children know what they are looking for," said the little prince. "they waste their time over a rag doll and it becomes very important to them; and if anybody takes it away from them, they cry..." -the lil prince
][juekbox][ jaci velasquez - just a prayer away
][feeling][
bitinn` awayy at 6:30 AM
```unravel.
a slow burning ecstasy//guitar and the day moon//petrol stations on the road//with no destination//you loved me in august//but you dont see me//so much more beautiful in april
```his child.
ron. 170387// icq.#74777649// yhoppie// deco ministry// neb3// jessie's.sheep// stnix// 4dee// sngg//
turnons. Him// red.black// two// tea// spag// piano// clavinova// EL-87// guitar// drummers// strawberry// peach// apple// tomato// chilli//
turnoffs. creepy crawlees// school// unoriginals// noise// imood.
```lookingood.
blacknwhite.
mvpcg.
170303.
fourdiligence.
cl huddle.
ex.neb8.
ex.clique.
bbq.130902.
siloso.300802.
pei.ron.yang.
ed.joe.ron.ser.
130503
140503
```lookingback.
splendiferus.
phagocytosis.
insync.
a slow burning ecstasy//guitar and the day moon//petrol stations on the road//with no destination//you loved me in august//but you dont see me//so much more beautiful in april
```his child.
ron. 170387// icq.#74777649// yhoppie// deco ministry// neb3// jessie's.sheep// stnix// 4dee// sngg//
turnons. Him// red.black// two// tea// spag// piano// clavinova// EL-87// guitar// drummers// strawberry// peach// apple// tomato// chilli//
turnoffs. creepy crawlees// school// unoriginals// noise// imood.
```lookingood.
blacknwhite.
mvpcg.
170303.
fourdiligence.
cl huddle.
ex.neb8.
ex.clique.
bbq.130902.
siloso.300802.
pei.ron.yang.
ed.joe.ron.ser.
130503
140503
```lookingback.
splendiferus.
phagocytosis.
insync.